November Rain
by Aelis
Summary: On a dull day in November, the rain brings out Quistis' hidden feelings.


November Rain  
  
A/N: Another rather old fic. It's about Quistis' feelings and thoughts. Rather on the depressing side.  
  
Thunder roared loudly in the sky as if it wanted to protest at every living soul, followed by the rain falling down in torrents filling the grounds of Balamb Garden with water.   
  
A young woman walked slowly up the hallway to her sleeping quarters. With a swift movement she typed her access number to her room and entered in her room. She closed her eyes and sighed as she sat down on her bed. She was feeling tired yet pleased at the same time that the field exams that she had to be one of the examiners were cancelled because of the weather. She removed her hair clip letting her golden hair pool on her shoulders.   
  
She sighed again and loosened her tie around her neck. "How long has it been now, a year?" she asked herself.  
  
She could still remember the time when she had fought against Ultimecia with Squall and the others. Now it was all over and she was left here all alone. What was she saying? She had always been alone since she could remember. Although during that time she was with all her childhood friends she still felt far away from all the others. But still it was a comforting feeling to be with them as a small family. No one understood her, not even the trepies who were constantly worshipping her, or the rest of her friends. It was all her fault maybe because she refused to show her real self and still continued to hide behind a mask of a cool and collected person. Yes, everyone thought that Instructor Trepe was a perfect image of what a SeeD member should be. Even Cid thought that because he decided that she would be again promoted to the license of an instructor.  
  
Maybe that was the reason that she noticed Squall when he entered Balamb Garden...because just like her he refused to break down the walls around him. Squall...she thought she was in love, yet later she realised that it was only because of a childhood memory that made her try to replace Ellone. Yet Squall didn't like her. He never did, he always ignored her and treated her as his instructor only. Even after she was demoted to a SeeD, he still called her "Instructor". He never seemed to bother about her except at a professional level.  
  
And then there was Seifer. Seifer...the sorceress' knight. She had always known that Squall and Seifer would end fighting against each other. Seifer and Squall were too different from each other. Yet, he was one of them...she always considered him as part of the orphanage. Seifer was always a rebel since he was a child. She still remembered how he used to tease Zell calling him nicknames like Cry-Baby-Zell and later the infamous nickname, Chickenwuss. That was probably the reason that Zell resented Seifer so much. She didn't think that Seifer liked her, anyway. He always thought of her as a bossy person that probably annoyed him since childhood.   
  
Zell, poor Zell he was always made fun of yet he was still the same old Zell who loved hot dogs and who attracted trouble to himself. Zell always treated her as a sort of older sister. Yet he was always too engrossed in what he was doing to notice how lonely she was.  
  
And, Selphie. The spunky little girl who seemed to have an unlimited store of energy. She respected her yet she didn't think of her as a friend, but more as a person in authority. There was still a distance between them.   
  
And then Irvine, the immature ladies man who was always flirting with all the girls. He always though of her as a bossy person and didn't even flirt with her in Galbadia Garden. He probably though that she was too serious for a teenager like her and she always scolded him for being a flirt.  
  
Then there was Rinoa...she didn't hate Rinoa yet she didn't exactly adore her. She was just sometimes annoyed of the way she had become one of them in such little time when they had a past in similar while Rinoa just butted in. Maybe she was just frustrated at the way she had taken Squall's heart when she had tried so hard. Maybe because Rinoa was more open than her. Rinoa was different than her because Rinoa didn't keep her feelings bottled up. She sometimes wished she were more like her. Rinoa wasn't either on very friendly terms with Quistis. Maybe it was because with her outburst of rage she had told Rinoa not to interfere with the sorceress assassination plan in Deiling City.   
  
Maybe she just needed to remove her mask, maybe being "perfect" is not that important, she didn't understand anything about relationships with her effort to try and appear perfect. She stood up walked up to her windowsill watching the rain fall. She loved the rain. It showed her real personality, her real self. At least the rain would cry for her. She walked outside her room in the hallway and leaned on the balcony, feeling the rain fall on her. She didn't care if she got wet. The surrounding gardens around Balamb Garden were dark yet she could see the trees sway with the wind..... 


End file.
